Big News

I have been back to work for almost 3 months. It was a struggle. I felt like I couldn't give 100% at work and 100% at home-something was always falling short. Then last week, on the first week of the nanny being here without my mother, Robinson had a very bad day. The nanny called me at work late one afternoon and said he had been crying on and off all day (not a huge deal, in fact, I kind of expected that), but she said this last episode had lasted 1.5 hours. I could hear Robinson in the background...he wasn't crying- he was screaming his head off. I told her I was coming home. Robinson sounded like a 80 year old smoker he was so raspy. He had cried so much that he was having difficulty breathing because too much phlegm had made its way to his lungs. I thought I was going to have to take him to the ER, but I went back to my NICU training that our lovely nurses gave us and used his saline drops and suction and within an hour or so he was sounding better. He spit up mucous almost all night...

Rian and I had a looooong talk that weekend. We decided that it would be the best decision for our family for me to turn in my notice and resign from work.

Was it a hard decision? yes

Do we 2nd guess whether it was the right decision? no

Robinson has been doing so well and if you look at him, he doesn't really "look" like a preemie so we think we got too comfortable and started treating him like a "full termer". But the reality is that he is not...and episodes like last week are dangerous and could seriously set him back as far as his lung maturity and his health. No one is going to take care of him as well as we could and we will feel much safer knowing that I am with him every day and we are doing the best that we can. My last day will be March 20th and then I'll have the new title of Stay at Home Mommy.

Other news: Robinson is up to 15 pounds as of a week ago!! He is in 6-9 month clothes, which truly amazes me. These clothes used to look HUGE to me, and now not only is he wearing them, but they FIT!! No big or hanging off here. Robinson is almost sitting up by himself, but definitely sits assisted. Is rolling front to back and back to front at leisure. Can hold up his head the entire time during tummy time...and has also started scooting. He can scoot on his stomach or back- this is the beginning of the crawling phase. I'll put him down turn my head for a second and look back and he's on the other side of the mat. Where has the time gone??

This is a self portrait that just melts my heart. Rian said that Robinson has this look on his face like "this is her, this is the one I've been telling you about- she's my mommy" :)

Can you believe how big he is getting? We need to take out that Infant Insert Padding, huh?

You got to love those baby blues

He gets so tickled sometimes at the camera. It's like he knows what it is and is posing for me.

This is his little chair that will help him build back muscles so that he can sit on his own one day.

Here is a video of Robinson laughing with his Nana. He LOVES his Nana and has so much fun with her. And his laugh is hilarious!